Broken.....

Do you ever feel broken?
I do. I know what you are thinking too.

"Broken? How does someone feel broken?"

Well, its not easy to explain. If you have felt it then you know exactly what I mean when I say I am broken. Its a weird, life altering mix of emotion and vulnerability.

First you have to have everything in your life going just the way you want it to.
Perfect kids, big house, a new relationship that is going well, you wake up every morning feeling loved and needed, but then it happens.........

You start feeling anxious about....well, about everything. Thinking you are wrong. After all you must be, right? How could everything be going so well yet leaving you with this strange feeling? Like you aren't good enough for your life.
You cry all the time, for no reason that you know of, crying just feels...........right but, also wrong. You are always so tired but, can't ever sleep.

When you do sleep, you sleep for days, loosing time with those you love, you feel bad, start to cry again, wake up on a tear soaked pillow thinking...........you start doing a lot of thinking.......thinking in circles, your head is spinning, more tears, you wake up, the evening sun is shinning in your window.

"What time is it?"

"7:15"

"Why is the sun going down?"

"Because its the other 7:15"

"Wait, what?'

It was 10 when you went to bed.

"What day is it?"

"Tuesday."

"Where did Monday go?"

"You were finally sleeping......
I didn't want to wake you"

Now you are thinking again, thinking.............thinking

........What the hell is wrong with me?........

Well my friend, you have gone and broken yourself.


"How do you fix broken?"

"I fix broken things with glue, maybe we can glue you."

Do you feel it?

Do you feel broken?

I do.
I am broken.
I am.
BROKEN.
I am Humpty Dumptey...............
All the King's horses and all the King's men..................

couldn't put me together again.....